an open letter to the lady at the gym today

dear lady at the gym who was dogging me while i was doing stairs, 

i have no idea why you were giving me bitchface. i have even less of an idea of why you decided to wear a ponytail hair extension comb thing to the gym, especially when you already have hair. 

however, i do know that karma bit you in the ass when you scratched your head in the sauna and that hair tumbled to the floor next to my feet. 

and yes, i enjoyed every second of picking that thing up with two fingers, handing it back to you with a disgusted face, and walking out of the sauna so i could laugh. 

sincerely, 

me